Is your soulmate sabotaging your relationship? Is the sabotage through words or actions, creating problems when it isn’t necessary? Do they make a big deal about small insignificant things that don’t really matter? What can you do if your soulmate is sabotaging your relationship?
ARE THEY DOING IT ON PURPOSE?
The first thing to keep in mind is your soulmate may not be fully aware they are sabotaging your relationship. They could be doing it on purpose of course. But in some instances they may have no idea what they’re doing. If your soulmate is purposely trying to cause trouble and drama, your best bet it to not engage in it. Now is the time to pull back and take care of yourself. Don’t feed the drama monster, otherwise it comes back repeatedly for more food. No one wants that. So when they’re acting out, find someplace else to be.
Is your soulmate sabotaging your relationship by being too controlling? Are they micro-managing every thing down to the minute detail? Do they freak out if they are not in control? Are you tired of being treated like a child?
Someone who is too controlling usually has no idea the resentment they are causing. They’re usually surprised when someone eventually blows up at them for being a control freak. It’s best to nip it in the bud and let them know they can’t control everything in their life, and sure as hell can’t control everything in yours. They need to be a partner in this relationship. And not the boss. You don’t want a boss, you want a partner. So they need to take it down several notches.
CREATING SOULMATE SABOTAGE
If your soulmate is too busy holding grudges for mistakes you have made in the past, this is another method of soulmate sabotaging. Of course they want you to forget or get over their mistake. But yours are burned in their mind. This is another thing that causes irreparable damage down the line. When they bring up your past mistakes, let them know they made a mistake bringing it up. They either have to let the past go, or you don’t see a future going forward. That may sound harsh, but it is the truth. If you can’t speak the truth in your relationship, what the hell are you doing in it?
Another method of soulmate sabotage occurs when your soulmate withdraws too often and for too long, whether it is done consciously or unconsciously. There has to be a compromise. If your soulmate is going through a rough patch, agree to give them space. But let them know you won’t allow their rough patch to become yours. You are their to help them, and if they don’t want your help, leave them alone. You don’t deserve to be treated that way so they need to come up with another strategy that works for both of you.
If you’re in a relationship you don’t get to withdraw from it for weeks and months on end. Either be a partner or go be single. Again, might sound harsh, but so are break-ups. Take your pick, either speak the truth or let your soulmate keep sabotaging your relationship and ruining it. The choice is yours.
When your soulmate takes too long to get over a fight, or refuses to apologize when they screw up, they are sabotaging your relationship. If you don’t hold them accountable when they are wrong, you are teaching them a bad lesson. You’re telling them this behavior is ok, and they are not responsible for cleaning up their own mess. You are also teaching them you aren’t worth an apology. Does that sound like a good idea? Uh, no. Again, very bad idea. You may think you are keeping things together but you’re sabotaging it yourself because you’re enabling their sabotage.
Both soulmates have to watch out for sabotage. Even if you don’t see it yourself, hopefully your soulmate will bring it to your attention so you can put a stop to it yourself.