Is Your Soulmate Emotionally Unavailable?

If your soulmate is emotionally unavailable, it will be very frustrating. Just because someone is single does not mean they are emotionally available for a relationship. Just because someone is single does not mean they want to have a relationship. And especially  so for one that comes with the deep connection of soulmates.


Not everyone will be searching for their soulmate or romantic partner this lifetime. They may be in a different place than you in their evolution and only want casual relationships. There are also people who have absolutely no intention of being monogamous, although they may say they are. They will never be emotionally available for you. There are many reasons why people will not be emotionally available for the type of relationship you are looking for.

soulmate psychic readings emotionally unavailabe man
Is Your Soulmate Emotionally Unavailable?

It is not always easy to spot an emotionally unavailable man or woman. They may present themselves in such a way that you believe they are ready for love. Everything may be flowing smoothly. You spend time together and they may really be pursuing you. And you like it. You have been hesitant with your feelings and keeping them in check, but they insist you are the one. They may even talk about your connection.

You finally give in, allowing yourself to open to the emotional bond that is forming, out of nowhere come the signals of an emotional midget. They withdraw, they pull back. And they start to cancel dates or fail to respond to calls and messages. You are more confused than ever because they displayed the signs of being emotionally ready.

But the instant you open up the walls go up and the lines of communication go down. When the possibility of a real relationship becomes a reality it’s more then they can handle. As long as it is an idea, it was ok. But the reality of it causes them to bolt.

Before you invest your heart in a relationship, you need to make sure you choose an emotionally available person. Here are some signs of someone who is emotionally unavailable so you can spot one.


If they already have a significant other they emotionally unavailable. If they are not divorced or still with someone, they are emotionally unavailable to you. No ifs, ands or buts about it. If they are separated but still live together for ANY REASON AT ALL, they off-limits to your heart. When you live with someone you cannot give someone else 100% of you. No matter how hard you try.

You will never get all they have to give because they are not available enough to give it to you. Even though they say they do not love the other person. Even though they say they love you. They may say they are not having sex and sleep in separate bedrooms. They insist you are their only sexual partner. But as long as any fragment of that relationship is intact they are not fully emotionally available to you.


If they are hard to reach for days, weeks or months, without explanation, they are emotionally unavailable. If they want to get closer to you, they would keep your communication steady and reliable. You would discuss deeper things than sex, the weather and your jobs. Your communication to learn more about them and give you the chance to learn more about them.

If trying to get them to talk is like pulling teeth they are emotionally unavailable. Never being available when you call or text the same rule applies. If the only way you communicate is through text, you both need to grow the hell up. When they don’t make communication with you a part of their life, they are unavailable to make YOU a real part of their life.


If your relationship has no labels or boundaries you are with someone emotionally unavailable. If you do not know if you are their girlfriend or boyfriend they are emotionally unavailable. When they refuse to talk about feelings or where this relationship is going, if you are even in a relationship run as fast as you can from this emotional midget. If their words and actions do not support each other, then you are with an emotionally unavailable person who is sending you mixed signals.


When you are with a someone long enough, the relationship develops a pattern. You talk once, twice  or three times a day. And you see each other every “X” amount of days. You also know you will see and hear from them again. When you are with someone who is emotionally unavailable, at the end of each phone call, you have no idea when you will speak to each other again.

After you part company, you wonder when and if you will see them again. This is not normal and is unacceptable. If you can’t begin to depend on them to call and make plans to see you, they are emotionally unavailable. When they don’t answer the phone when you call with an emergency, they are not emotionally available to you.

soulmate psychic readings emotionally unavailabe man
Is Your Soulmate Emotionally Unavailable?


Someone who is single, but has not dealt with issues of a past relationship should be emotionally off-limits. These folks could still secretly be in love with their ex. Or they tell you all about it ~ ALL THE TIME ~ when you are out together. They have not resolved their feelings from their last relationship. And they could be using you as the rebound to help get over the ex. They are treading water with you in the hopes the ex will return to their life at some future point.

They tell you they can’t open up to you because they are still resolving the issues of their last relationship. Then they proceed to tell you (with tears in their eyes) the gory details that led to the relationship’s demise, they are still emotionally attached their ex and not available for you. You will not be able to rescue or save them from the horrible creature who did this since they are still emotionally attached to that past relationship.


So what do you do with an emotionally unavailable soulmate? How do you handle the relationship? Bottom line is they will not be there for you. You may believe if they heal from a past relationship you can sit tight and wait it out. Honestly, it is not in your best interest to do that WITH them.

No amount of love you show or things you do will be able to crack the steel drum around their heart. You can not fix or heal them. It is not your responsibility anyway. You may want to be there so when he does heal his emotional issues you are the first one he turns to. Bottom line though, if you made that great of an impression anyway, he would come to you when he is ready for love again.

Loving an emotionally unavailable soulmate is very draining because you are doing all the work. They are doing nothing. You are giving and not receiving anything. You can only do that for so long until all your reserves are gone. Sitting back and hoping for change is not going to fix this dysfunctional relationship. We all want to do the best we can to not be shocked, disappointed or hurt in our relationships. The best insurance we have to prevent that from happening is to choose wisely. An emotionally unavailable soulmate is not a wise choice.

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Originally posted on 06/08/2013 @ 9:17 am

17 thoughts on “Is Your Soulmate Emotionally Unavailable?”

  1. Keep moving every single day. It gives you more of an opportunity to meet another who will be emotionally available to you.

  2. Hi ive been seiing this guy for approx 18months. His wife passed away a year ago but he had already separated from her. I love him do much and i love his son. His son loves me and of late wants a mother hugs so to.speak from me. Me and his son have deveopled a goid relationship. Me and his dad have a good relationship when we are together .. it feels right. Every now and then not often, he leaves me out . His parents and rest of his family and friends know of me and its all good. But there is one person thst dont know of me im a secret. This person is very best friend of hid late wife.
    Im aftaid of losing him so.much it feels right. I love him so.much we havebalot in common and having out birthday only 3 days apart we are very similar and havenalot in common. I feel we r meant to be and he has express his feelings for me but not tbe word love. He knows how i.feel about him and he even said he will feel the same 9ne day. He has alot of mental baggage but at times wo t admit it.
    I just want tobr with so much. We are planning a holiday together which we r looki g forward to.
    His son at times gets uncomfortable when we get intimate but i.have explainef to.his son that i love his dad and that i will never take his dad away. He seemed to exceot it so far.
    I font know whst to do as i dont know where i stand. I feel there is sometjing not right. He collect3d his wife’s ashes today whether that will pay a part i dont know. He still loves her deep down and yes we havev gone into great conversations regarding his wife and he was honest with his feelings and i.get it. He has told me i make him and his son very happy and he is happy tbe way thing are at stage of our relationship. He keeps telling me be patient i will get what i want from him.
    Please advise on what do or be patient.

  3. I’m with a 40 year old man, I’m 30 and well he told me he was emotionally unavailable and said to cause less heartache and being hurt that maybe we shouldn’t be a couple. Does that mean he doesn’t want to be with me or I’m not sure. Then he goes on about him being like a mirror wich he does the same to me, I guess like what I do effects him and vice versa. I really do love him but should I let him go I was with him for over 2 years now and nothing is moving on with me and him. he still lives with his parents and don’t have a job and he stop spending time like he use to with me yea I get hes there for his parents but when I told him I felt lonely all he told me was he was sorry I was like what the heck. The last time I seen him wich wasn’t for long he didn’t even tell me he loved me I was just shocked by it. I just not sure what to do

  4. Im in the same position. This guys trying to get over his ex who he’s known for 3 months. Its been a month since they broke up. Said he felt really connected with her. When we first started talking, he said he was going through a breakup and may need space until he works through his stuff. I agreed with him and let him know that i am interested in him but won’t put my life on hold for him. I tried doing that, but he’s such a decent guy and i felt a connection with him but im sure he’s so confused right now- he’s not even thinking about me. The thing is, i can’t move onto a new guy with unresolved feelings, so i have to be disciplined in my thinking and decide to give it 2 months and see if he makes contact. By then, im hoping he will have moved on from his ex and me too -from him, but hopefully i won’t have to.
    I just hope hes emotionally ready in time to open up again and connect to someone else, as i don’t think you can connect to just one person out of millions.

  5. Amazing explanation… I’m in relationship with an emotionally unavailable man who only thinks about his family. I become very upset, cry and sometimes feel depressed and feel like ending my life.I love him so very much but he never understand my feelings, never care for my emotions, never make an effort to console me.sometimes I feel like going far away from him but at this moment I’m not in that position. Extremely unbearable pain in heart. Thanks for posting such a nice article now I understand him properly and its time for me to make a change.can’t expect anything else from just accept the way he is because I love him so much and be happy. Would you like to give any advice for me

  6. Excellent article! I’m really looking for some help and any tips to have ‘the detach conversation’ from a man like this- Do they understand when you tell them how it is? My emotionally unavailable man is extremely UN self-aware, in general and in the case of being this way, but I have a hard time understanding how he can be so in the dark about it? How aware are these men of themselves and how they treat us and how it makes us feel?
    Thanks in advance for any helpful and kind words!, much appreciated

    • Hi Lauren.. no they are not truly consciously aware they are that way it is more of a subconscious thing for most of them BUT if you broach the subject with him you wll more than likely get the deer in the headlights look because he will not want to discuss it. Please call one of us for personal guidance to see if we can help with this situation.

  7. Wow. This article is just DEAD ON. I have learned from a very bad four year experience, this is ABDOLUTE TRUTH. Every single woman should read this.

    • I wish I could have known this 6 months ago. Great article and all of it true. Now for the first time in my life I am getting counseling and taking anti-anxiety medication because of my relationship with an emotionally unavailable man – and he is absolutely clueless about what a wreck I have become. Breaking away is hard to do, but I will never get involved with one of these men again now that I know what to look for. Nothing but Heartbreak City. : (

      • good for you for taking control and charge of your life. blessings!

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