Soulmate relationships can be dysfunctional relationships. Soulmates are often portrayed as meeting, falling instantly in love, and living happily ever after. In reality, soulmate relationships can often become dysfunctional relationships. Primarily, due to the intensity of emotions, chemistry and the soulmate connection, logic and fair play can fly out the window. When emotions run high, they can often spiral out of control, this is when dysfunctional behaviors and patterns emerge. So how can you keep your soul mate relationship from becoming dysfunctional?
First and foremost you must try to keep your emotions regarding your soul mate in check. These emotions will be intensely positive when things are going well, but can easily turn intensely negative when things turn bad between the two of you. For example, after meeting your soulmate and being blissfully happy for several months, your soulmate pulls a disappearing act and totally retreats away from the relationship and from you. They won’t return phone calls, emails, texts or social media pings. They go completely silent. It is understandable that you will be anxious and upset, but this is dysfunctional soulmate behavior. When a soulmate withdraws, the other soulmate has to prevent themselves from going nuts. When the soul mate returns is the crucial point. If you forgive your soulmate and allow them back into your life too easily, because you fear losing them again, you are actually creating a dysfunctional pattern. This can lead to your soulmate randomly disappearing over and over again. Because you allowed their dysfunctional behavior without real consequences, they will do it over and over again.
By doing that, your fears regarding your soulmate will grow exponentially. Your fear of losing them permanently makes you more lenient and you can expect more dysfunctional behavior from your soulmate. You soulmate, on the other hand, has ZERO fear of losing you. You have shown them they can get away with their dysfunctional behavior and that you are willing to take them back every time. Now your soulmate relationship is a dysfunctional mess. If you have found yourself in a dysfunctional soulmate relationship, look back at the bad behaviors of your soulmate. Now look at how you handled them. The time has come to change the way you handle your soulmate or your dysfunctional relationship will only continue to get worse.
Soulmate relationships are supposed to teach lessons. If you are not willing to assist your soul mate in learning those lessons, the relationship may be doomed. Not all soulmate relationships stand the test of time. Why? Because the bond that is supposed to bring out the best in them often brings out the worst in them. It is because of this that a dysfunctional soulmate relationship reaches the end of the line. When both parties embrace and accept the gifts that their soulmate brings, instead of abusing, taking advantage of it or taking it for granted, all is well. If they do not, chaos erupts. The universe brings soulmates together, but they leave it up to the two of you to make it work. When you see dysfunctional behavior begin to grow in your soulmate relationship, nip it in the bud before it ruins this special soulmate connection.
Contrary to popular belief, soulmates face a lot of relationship issues. In the real world, the Universe, or fate, does not step in to ensure a couple will stay together. That only happens in chick-flicks. Soulmates are not in our lives for a perfect romantic relationship. Soulmates are in our lives to provide personal growth and life lessons. Many people, who are involved with soulmates, are often surprised by the number of issues, problems and obstacles they encounter with their relationship. Based on our experience, we have compiled a list of issues soulmates need to be aware of when in a soulmate relationship.
1. Bad timing. Many soulmates have to deal with bad timing. If one or both partners are involved in other relationships when they meet, a bad timing issue is present. Another could be that the soul mates meet but one has to move across the country for work or family crisis. The time apart can be very challenging for one or both soulmates, and is a time that lessons emerge. We have to remember that we designed it before we were born, for a reason. That reason is the life lessons that come with the challenge.
2. Bad behavior. Soulmates are not always on their best behavior. As a matter of fact, it is usually quite opposite. For example, one or both soulmates could have an addiction to drugs, sex or alcohol. They could exhibit signs they only know how to be in dysfunctional relationships. There could also be self-destructive behavior or bad behavior stemming from unresolved past issues. In order for the relationship to grow and evolve, each of the soulmates will need to evolve and change.
3. Denial. When a connection between soulmates is too intense for one or both to handle, denial comes in handy. They can and will do everything they can to disprove the connection exists. When this occurs they can actually block all contact with their soulmate. In their minds it is somehow easier to deny the connection rather than accept and the soulmate relationship. This is a difficult issue to deal with because you will still very much feel that open soulmate connection. But the other soulmate does not mirror it back but tucks it away and refuses to acknowledge it.
4. Disappearing acts. Soulmates are very good at disappearing and can actually do so quite frequently. Soulmates can disappear, and reappear, many times during the length of a soulmate connection. The real key here is to understand why it is happening but also how you manage yourself during the disappearing acts. When a soulmate is missing in action for weeks or months at a time it can be quite frustrating. When it happens again and again, it can destroy the connection between soulmates once and for all.
5. Love triangles. Quite often soulmates have a problem with interference from another man or woman. It could be a previous relationship that has not fully resolved, or a new relationship that creates a diversion from dealing with a soulmate relationship. There are many scenarios involving soulmates and love triangles. Unfortunately the damage done to soulmate relationships through love triangles can be astronomical.
6. Moving too fast. Often soulmates feel they have known each other forever, and feel comfortable very quickly. The soul level recognition between you creates that comfort and familiarity. Additionally, the sparks are flying and you want to feel and experience the connection as much as possible. Because of this, it is quite easy for relationships to develop way too quickly and move too fast. What was speeding along at 90 miles an hour can slow to a screeching halt at any moment. It can be very difficult for the intense emotions and connection to match the logical amount of time the couple has been together. This adjustment can cause major issues. One of the soulmates will slow down the connection in order to focus on normal life stuff. The other feels this subtle shift in energy, and can often panic and feel the relationship is coming to an end.
7. The highest highs and the lowest lows. Soulmates seem to feel and experience everything to the extreme. The good times are fantastic and the bad times are bloody awful. When things are going great and the connection is flowing, you feel as if you are on top of the world. When things are not flowing well between soulmates, you can become depressed, despondent, lazy, irresponsible, indolent and even manic. It is very important you find another outlet when things are low between soulmates and maintain a level of accountability for your life.
8. Fear. Some people, mostly the guys out there, are terrified by the overwhelming emotion in a soulmate connection. Soulmates must face their fears, as part of their soulmate contract. But what exactly is there to fear from a soulmate connection? Some soulmates fear a loss of control, fear trusting someone with their heart, fear the responsibility of being in a relationship, fear being accountable their soulmate partner, etc. These may not be fears to you, but to them they are very real. When soulmates are unable to face those fears, they can either run or deny the soulmate connection.
9. Unrealistic expectations. Many soulmates believe a soulmate is here for the duration and that they will stay together regardless of how they behave. They may believe they can do anything, or say anything, without affecting their soulmate relationship. They may even think it gives them carte blanche for screwing up. Nothing could be further from the truth. Not all soulmates stay together, and if you keep testing your connection, your soulmate may walk away for good.
10. Accepting unacceptable behavior. Because of the strong emotional and often empathic connection, soulmates can lose any semblance of reason or logic. You may find yourself tolerating behavior from a soulmate that you would NEVER tolerate from any person on earth. These behaviors can include, cheating, drinking, drug abuse, gambling and physical or emotional abuse. If you don’t tolerate this behavior from anyone else, how could you tolerate it from your soulmate? What is the lesson here? This will make for a highly dysfunctional relationship and one you would be ultimately very miserable in.
Sarah and Sophia are able to understand the hidden complexities, issues and concerns affecting soulmate relationships. If you are experiencing issues with your soulmate, Sarah and Sophia can guide you on what needs to be addressed to give your soulmate relationship a better chance of working out long-term.
Many times we are asked “How can I meet my soulmate?” If we believe in a truly limitless Universe, we must consider that the way our soulmate can enter our lives is limitless. Soulmate relationships are not something we create or find. Soulmate relationships are somewhat predestined or preordained, as a result of the karmic experiences we agree upon before being born. Soulmate relationships are not something we can seek while here on this earthly plane, but rather people who find each other when the time is right, as written in your soulmate contract. So it’s not so much a question of “How can I meet my soulmate?” but what is the Universe doing to bring them into your life.
When deep down in the core of your being you believe that your soulmate exists, there is no limit to the ways he or she can enter your life. ~~Arielle Ford
There is no How Can I Meet My Soulmate club or website. In reality there are not any meditations, visualizations or other metaphysical gimmicks you can do to draw your soulmate to you. You will either meet them in this lifetime… or you won’t. Remember this is something you agreed to experiencing before you were born so a soulmate relationship may not necessarily be part of you soul blue print for this lifetime. Please remember though that DOES NOT mean you will not have a fulfilling, connected, romantically intimate relationship for this lifetime. Actually, you may be better of in a romantic relationship that is not a soulmate relationship as it will not come with the challenges and difficulties associated with a soulmate partnership.
Now all this is well enough said but is there anything at all you can do to meet your soulmate? There are a few things that need to be in place for that soulmate connection to manifest in the earthly plane. First and foremost you need to be working on yourself. By this we mean not just floating through life and reacting to different things that happen to you. You must be focused on yourself. You must be growing, personally and spiritually and you must be taking a proactive approach to the evolution of your soul as you live on the planet.
Soulmates tend to find each other during their respective pursuits of their soul missions. ~ Linda Brady
Now we don’t mean that you need to involved with saving all sea lions or volunteering to feed the hungry children of Africa, although these are both worthwhile endeavors. We mean that you have to be focused on you and your soul’s growth. In other words, focus on why you are here on the planet, whatever that may be. For when you are doing this you are in perfect alignment with your soul blueprint and placing yourself in optimal positioning to meet your soulmate. Work on yourself. Work on your personal and spiritual development. This allows the Universe to see that you are working on your soul path and actually ready to have a soulmate encounter and experience.
COPYRIGHT 2014. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
Life without soulmates? How could even begin to imagine life without soulmates? The concept of soulmates emerged in Plato’s Symposium, so in theory the idea of everyone having another half of themselves has been around since ancient Greece. In the New Age however, it began to take on a more romantic undertone with the implication that we as humans will never be whole without our other half, or our soulmate. Many people feel if they don’t meet their soulmate that they must resign themselves to a life without joy, love or happiness. They feel that they will only find that happiness once they have found that soulmate. Union with the soulmate will release them from a lifetime of doom, gloom and misery. Isn’t that a very high expectation to place on someone?
From a personal spiritual growth perspective, the concept of being complete without your other half is the challenge of our lifetimes. To find your true romantic soulmate you have to be whole yourself. To be with your soulmate you need to be a complete person before a successful soulmate relationship can be defined. So essentially we are all stuck in a Catch-22. You want your soulmate to complete you, but you can’t find your soulmate because you are not whole as you are. So what is the solution? To work on yourself to become whole.
If you want your soulmate to appear in your life the best way to make that happen is to work on your own fears, phobias and insecurities. By now you will have already experienced a series of relationships, both good and bad. What did you learn from them? How did you handle the breakups? Did you wallow in misery attaching your happiness only to being with the person who ended your relationship? Or did you grieve a little, accept it and move on? Relationships, whether soulmate or not, are here to provide us valuable lesson, not only about relationships but about ourselves. We need to take what we learned from that relationship, assimilate it into the core of who we are, so that when it comes time for the next one, we will avoid the same mistakes.
If you are feeling lost because you have not found your soulmate, go out and have fun! Take classes, accept social invitations, learn to sail and do anything else that brings YOU joy. Do it for you, do it for yourself. Do the things that make YOU happy. Complete yourself! By shifting that thing within you that makes you feel incomplete and without wholeness, you will start filling in the gaps in your own energy so your soulmate can materialize. A potential soulmate partner will not be attracted to someone who is sad, melancholy or gloomy. When you are out and about walk with your head lifted and don’t stare at the floor. Smile and radiate confidence . Lift your energy and you will lift your vibration. In order for your true romantic soulmate to enter your life your vibrational energy needs to be high! Release any emotional baggage and other stuff tying you to the past, or a past relationship, that you have been carrying around with you. Let it go. Hauling that stuff around with you can make you weary.
When you are feeling happy, confident and complete, you stand a much greater chance of finding your soulmate. On their own, soulmate relationships come with major challenges and you will need to be at your BEST when you do find each other. Soulmate relationships are in our lives to teach us about ourselves through personal growth and spiritual lessons. You have to be ready to deal with what the Universe throws at you after you have met your soulmate so it is better to be in as whole as you can be when you find them.
Your soulmate really does not complete you, nor you them, in spite of what Tom Cruise said in “Jerry Maguire”. No one completes anyone. You need to be complete and whole on your own in order for your soulmate relationship to come into your life.
If you are wondering what is keeping you from meeting your soulmate, give Lady Sarah or Sophia Elise. They are both Relationship ~ Soulmate ~ Twinflame Experts. During a psychic reading with them you will be able to know and understand what is holding you back from meeting your soulmate. On the other hand, perhaps you are with your soulmate and you are currently in that space where there is soulmate conflict. Lady Sarah and Sophia Elise are here to help you work through any those problems, give you real workable solutions and help you get to the other side so you can KEEP your soulmate in your life!
When your soulmate is at a stalemate, you can feel pretty miserable. If you have been reading our blog for a while you will totally understand what we mean when we say soulmate relationships are often challenging ones. We say this all the time, over and over again, to be honest… but so many folks still operate under the misconception that just because some one is their soulmate, that all will work out with divine intervention. This is simply not always the case.
Many people think soulmate relationships, because of the deep connection, naturally evolve and become long term relationships usually involving marriage. Just because someone may be one of your romantic soulmates, does not mean that it will easily take this journey. Actually, this is a huge error in thinking. Soulmate relationships usually require a lot of work to move them up the relationship ladder. And many times you will find that the relationship just hits the wall and realize your soulmate is at a stalemate.
SO what are some examples of when a soulmate is at a stalemate?
- Your romantic partner may not be ready to have a deeply connected committed relationship.
- Your soulmate may have disappeared, without word or warning, just poof, perhaps never to be heard from again.
- There is no growth in your relationship – no movement toward commitment or engagement… staying in the same place for a long time, perhaps even years.
- You believe you have met your soulmate, but unfortunately one or both of you are involved in other relationships.
- You have met someone you feel a deep connection to but they are not interested in having the same relationship that you do.
- You may be involved with someone who is your soulmate but there is problem after problem, and even breakup after breakup and it could even be an on-again off-again relationship.
So what do you when your soulmate is at a stalemate? You have to take action. The universe may create soulmate connections, but what we do with them is of our own free will. The soulmate fairy is not going to come down and waver her magic wand to fix your relationship. YOU will have to fix it, or make the difficult decision to end it. It is time to stop waiting for divine intervention, and be take action. Essentially people have to be forced to change, and until you create the change, you can pretty much bet that your soulmate won’t change either. But when you change, in the way you act, react and even speak to your soulmate, they will have to naturally change to reflect the changes in you.
Not only do you have to look at what is causing the stalemate in your relationship, but how you both contributed to this status. You may think it all rests with the other person, but it may actually start with you. Just because someone is your soulmate does not mean you have to lower your standards, deny yourself self-respect, and allow someone to treat you like dirt and take advantage of you. This is not what it is about because this is what the Universe wants for you.
If you find yourself in this situation, where your soulmate is at a stalemate, it is time to take action. Sarah and Sophia are experts at seeing deep into your soulmate relationship to find exactly where the stalemate and stagnation is coming from and give you an action plan to guide you to bringing it back into balance. They will also be able to see if it is time to let any hope of the relationship go and give you steps to take for moving on with your life.