Soulmate connections often come with drama and obstacles, and quite often one of them may be his ex. Like many soulmates, you may have met when he was in a relationship with someone else. Soulmates often encounter one another when one, or both of them are currently in a relationship. The current relationship can be what keeps soul mates apart, and the stress and despair can be excruciating.
At this point the ex is not an ex. You pray for the day they will and their relationship, and you wait. And you wait. And you pray. And you cry. And you wait some more. You build up a hatred towards this person, the one he is involved with, because you feel they are holding your happiness in their hands. You hear how horrible they treat your soulmate. You think of how lucky they are to have your soulmate and how they don’t even appreciate it. You feel so bad for your soulmate that they are treated so badly in their current relationship. You hope they have the courage to leave the dead-end relationship is making them so miserable.
Then you start to get frustrated. Why are they remaining with this person that makes them so unhappy? They could be with you instead! What hold does this witch have over him that causes him to stay? You may even begin to feel as though you will never be together and that you will have to move on, giving up on this relationship completely.
Then, one day, that relationship is over. You are thrilled!! Finally, the day you have been waiting for! She has been given the boot and you have your chance at happiness. But now you must deal with an ex who could make the break-up or divorce very challenging and contentious. You must be careful not to let that stress affect your relationship with your soulmate.
The relationship with his ex, if toxic, can mean toxic relationship baggage will be coming into YOUR relationship. You may be so thrilled you finally have your soulmate that you don’t nip bad behaviors right away. You must use special care that the relationship with your soulmate does not become as dysfunctional as the one he had with his ex. His ex may also try to turn his children, friends or family against you. Be careful not to sink to their level, which will only make you look bad. It may take time for the ex to focus their energy elsewhere, but try to ride it out.
The ex may not want to see him happy, and may do everything and anything to cause friction between you. Your soulmate needs to understand that his ex is not his problem to deal with alone. If his ex is not bothering you in the slightest, let him handle it himself. But if his ex causes him to break dates with YOU or affect your life in any real way, you should be allowed some input. It may be HIS ex, but if she is YOUR problem too, you should be able to deal with it as a couple.
Since he couldn’t handle her when he was in a relationship with her, why would he think he can handle her now? He can’t. Work together as a team in dealing with her, otherwise you are both playing right into her hands. Every fight you have about his ex is a victory for her. Since she is in the past, she needs to stay in the past. His ex should have no control of your daily lives. You both need to let go of his ex. You need to drop your resentment and hatred (and so does he if he has any) towards his ex and live your lives. This person has wasted enough of your valuable time. Focus on the two of you, and things will turn out just fine.
There will be a follow on article to this post about how exes can affect soulmate relationships. Keep checking back.